It was raining cat and dog,I was snuggling at the edge of my bed since I had no pillow to cuddle with (this is not about a pillow). The rain droplets were racing against my window pane. It was loud.

The rhythm of the droplets got my mind pacing, its dropping noise stirred up tons of thoughts. Thoughts of What’s and if’s. Like, what if my pane cracks open, what if the roof goes off, what if the rain doesn’t stop, what if and what if kept raging through. But one ‘what if’ got me soliciting for my life. What if I try to blink and my eyes never open again and…

And what? The end.

I was struggling to keep my eyes from blinking for fear of the worst, it was slowly building into a panicky when someone yelled “Why do we let Portia do this to us”.  It came from my phone screen. I was watching a series called Bad Behavior.

I didn’t even realize that all these happened within five seconds. Five seconds of setting myself up for a panic attack.

“Why are you now gisting us?”  You ask.

The point is why do we allow our thoughts to control us? Why do we always think about the worst case scenario? Why do  We set ourselves up for failure by thinking about it?

‘I am not good enough. I can’t do it. Nobody likes me. I will never pass the interview. He has more assets than me.’

Okay,  Her father has connections and so what? He started the business before you and so? Why do we let our mind limit us, reducing our potentials to zero. We belittle ourselves in front of people who we can easily triumph over. We hide our shine for fear of being too bright. We go on to submerge ourselves in right water corners and suffer.

Ben Carson didn’t write his bestseller Think Big  out of some comic show. He wrote it for you and I, for people who don’t know what wonders they can do by thinking big. I read it at the age of 14 and trust me and my imaginations to make use of the words on those pages of he’s. I really thought I could be an astronaut by reading astronomy and zodiac literature in the library during Marketing classes.(I don’t want to talk about it).

Maybe it’s time you start pushing those negative thoughts in your head back. Stop setting yourself up for the worst scenarios. Don’t allow those around you to intimidate you.

You are a product of what you think at night before you shut your eyes. You’re a fragment of everything you do and surround yourself with. Be better. Do better.

I hope you grabbed my point? And I really have to go back to this disturbing movie I was watching, it is  triggering.(Featured image credit : Submerged in Anxiety by Saatachi Art)